Bang! Zoom! It's Barsoom!

[Buster's Uncle]

Link Pyrebound in your sig?

[Elok]

Well, it's already my "website" link, but sure.  I counted it as a major victory when Google ranked my serial above an armor enchantment from Guild Wars by the same name ...

[Elok]

Third son born 6/8/19 at 2:29 am.  Everything and everyone fine.

[Buster's Uncle]

SIR!   

[Buster's Uncle]

-Wait.  Cyril?  CYRIL?  That's child abuse.

[Elok]

Lilith chose Cyril, I chose Constantine.  There were no names one of us liked that the other didn't dislike at least a little, and she hated Constantine about as much as I hated Cyril (which she liked for synesthetic reasons--the name is "white and gold," apparently).  It's kind of a fair compromise.  She was actually so eager for Cyril that she would have tolerated "Belisarius," which I'd been pushing for since the first one, but I decided Belisarius was a little too weird even if he was an awesome Byzantine hero.
Anyway, he's going to be "Pippin" for a very long time.  The kids have been calling him that for months, and they aren't going to stop now.

[E_T]

Good for you!!

[Geo]

Congrats.

[Rusty Edge]

Congratulations!

[Buster's Uncle]

Why not share that reader feedback post to your writer page?

[Buster's Uncle]

I've begun catching up on Pyrebound today - it's scanning pretty well.  I'll surely have more to say soon when I've read more.

What've you been working on lately?

[Buster's Uncle]

Hmm.  You know, you really need to give Father a head wound, too, or otherwise some reason he can't ever supervise Ram doing mason work, why they never for a second hope for him giving Ram a crash course enough to get by.  It's probably just the economics don't work in a harsh society, but then nothing Ram could possibly do would raise money enough, fast enough.  That a village of only 500 supported a single mason who did nothing else doesn't make sense, for that matter, certainly not three, two of whom have helpers.

If you ever get to another draft, do at least handwave those issues, willya?

[Elok]

(sorry, Dormition fast!  And before that, Malwarebytes was refusing to let me on here b/c it insisted ac2 had a Trojan!  Noticed this thanks to obsessive tracking of WP analytics; thanks for reading.  Will try to get back to you after the fast ends in nine days.)

[Buster's Uncle]

I must say that I never believed in the cave world of the previous version, and that does a lot to make up for I read a previous version and reckon I know, broadly, where this is going up to where the previous stopped.

I 'spose you realize that every character save Ram is unlikeable or barely a walk-on part?  Did I point out before that Ram is Clay w/ less siblings and his parents fit pretty well with the ones from Spenser's Mountain?  (The Waltons, if you're familiar, is a watered-down version of same.)  The setting and main action of both, based on the youth of writer Earl Hamner, is very different, but bildungsromans in hard times.  -At any rate, not a criticism, but something to be aware of; Ram lives in a hard world (Sumerian water monopoly, more-or-less, w/ some Andre Norton dimensional-shift stuff) full of hard people, entirely w/o real friends, even in his family.  It doesn't make Touring The Thing a glorious joy, when the Thing is a crapsack world inhabited by buttholes...

-I'm currently at 3.3, and I'm thrilled for you that it's getting views and a couple of reliable commenters...

[Buster's Uncle]

I made it up to the first instalment of Chapter Four last night - and, as one of your regulars said, it was good to see Ram have a pleasant evening.  -It's also good that you explicitly have some money going home and work that Ma and Pa are doing okay.  That was ignored, I think, in the previous version, what dire straights Ram disappearing from civilization would leave them in...

The changes in the progression of the Black Band plot are solid.  The ho' is both more appealing/credible in this version, and developments regarding, so far more creditable.

Mylochka has kept me busy so far today with this and that connected to the Frida Kahlo in Love website, so I haven't even begun my morning internet browse yet, so prospects are poor-ish for more reading today, but it's on my to-do list if I get caught up enough...